The Pioneer Day to Remember

Today was surgery day. It was the day we had been looking forward to since we found out about Linc's heart defect. It was also the day we dreaded. I must admit it has been one of the most stressful and emotional days of my life. (It doesn't help that I've reach the weepy stage of post pregnancy.) After today it would be all about recovery but first we had to get through surgery.

Lets start with Tuesday.

On Tuesday we had been told that surgery would happen on Thursday. Around noon that day the nurses informed us that surgery had been moved to Wednesday because they had a big surgery planned Thursday and Linc was recovered enough to handle the stress. I was shocked at how unprepared I felt for surgery. I was ready for it to happen on Thursday but moving it up a day really took me for a loop. Luckily our family was flexible and everyone was able to come up Tuesday night for a Priesthood Blessing. We also got the word out quickly so family and friends could start fasting for us.

Around 5pm we met our cardiovascular surgeon Dr. Eckhauser. He came at us with a lot of information but also with a lot of patience. He explained his plan for surgery, the risks and then asked us to sign the papers giving our consent. It was such a feeling to give consent for our child. Its hard being in charge of another little life. The rest of the evening was full of different doctors coming in and explaining their parts in the surgery and getting us to sign paperwork. It was very overwhelming.

Melanie, Mark, Tyler, Melissa, Dad, Darla, Grandma Ann all came up to the room around 8pm to give Lincoln a blessing. It was a very special moment. The Spirit was so strong. The men first blessed Linc, then me and finally Mark blessed Ryan. I hadn't even thought to ask for a blessing for myself lucky my husband kept me in mind. The blessing really set my mind at ease. I was still frightened but I felt that peace that only the Spirit can bring.

After the blessing we all headed downstairs to chat for a few minutes. I love how my family can keep the humor alive during hard times. We had a few laughs before everyone had to go.

Ryan and I then went back up to Linc's room to get as much time with him as we could. Since we found the surgery had been moved we had both been holding Lincoln as much as possible. We knew that after surgery it would be awhile before he'd be back in our arms. Around 11:30pm we went up to our room for the night. We were very blessed to get a Ronald McDonald Room for the night. (That was another miracle since we asked late due to the change of schedule)

We had our own little family prayer before hitting the sack. I was surprised at how much sleep we got. (Another miracle) We woke up at 4am because I had to pump. We decided to just head down to his room and spend more time with him. We spent an amazing 3 hours with our little man. He spent the whole time in our arms.  It was marvelous.

We were still very tired. Both of us fell asleep while holding him for part of the time. 

Also the hospital was freezing today so all three of us was swaddled with blankets. 

Our first family picture with Lincoln not in a hospital bed. This was taken right before they wheeled him away.

At 7:45am the nurses gave him a sanitizing bath and then we all walked down to surgery. At this time Lincoln woke up and was just looking around, content as could be. The anesthesiologist met us in the hallway and explained one last time what he would be doing.  He then told us it was time to give our little man our love and send him down the hall. We both kissed our little one and said our goodbye. I thought everything was hard before but that moment took the cake. Especially since his eyes were wide open and so trusting. 

The nurses then took us to the surgery waiting room, hooked us up with a pager and let us settle in. We stayed there until the Dr. Eckhauser came in 45 minutes later to ask us one more time if we had questions and assure us that everything would be fine. Ryan and I then took our pager and went back up to our McDonald room to get a 50 minute nap. Once again as soon as our heads hit the pillow we were out. (Another miracle. After that nap we had a total of 4 hours of sleep)

Quick side-note: I had the craziest dream during that nap. I dreamt that it was surgery day and Ryan just flipped out. After taking away Linc, Ryan decided we needed to go on a cruise so off we went. The whole time we were on the cruise I kept trying to convince Ryan that we needed to get back to the hospital for our baby. Finally I found a family that was flying back to Salt Lake and I gave Ryan an ultimatum, I was flying back to be with Lincoln, Ryan could stay or come with me but I was going. I woke up with sea-legs. During our nap we got our first update on the pager. We cleaned up our room and went back to the waiting room refreshed and ready for the long wait. The surgery took 4 hours. 

Here are our updates. 

7:45am- We wheeled him down to the anesthesiology and said our goodbyes

8:30am-Dr. Eckhauser came in one last time to reassure us and get any final questions. 

9:00am- The doctor started the surgery.

10:00am-First OR update "he is on bypass and doing great"

11:00am-Second update "Repair is done, still on bypass, warming him up and waiting for an echo to confirm the repair is good" At 11:00am Dad and Darla showed up to wait with us. It was so nice having them with us even if all we did was silent individual work. Having family close really made all the difference.

Grandpa Davidson sat like this for the 2 hours he waited. 

12:30pm- Third update "He is doing good, off bypass, post op echo looks good, watching his swelling but probably will keep his chest open until Friday, surgeon will be out in an hour to chat with us about what happened."

1:00pm- Dr. Eckhauser came out and chatted with us. I'll be honest I tried to keep up with his explanation but after I heard that Lincoln had done well my brain kind of shut off. Ryan will give you a full surgical report tomorrow. 

Here is what I understood. There were a couple surprises but nothing they couldn't handle. One surprise was some bruising to his heart due to CPR at delivery. The VSD (hole in the bottom two chambers) was also bigger then they thought it would be, about the size of a quarter. The coarctation (the skinny aorta coming out of the top of his heart that sends oxygen rich blood to the body) was very skinny so it was a good thing that they opened Linc's chest up. 

They had talked about just fixing the coarctation through the side, going through the ribs and leaving the VSD to be corrected in a few months. They are very glad they didn't do that given the size of the VSD and the length of the coarctation.    

Lincoln's body was very swollen and they decided to keep his chest open until the swelling goes down. They will sew up his chest in the CICU (Cardiac ICU) hopefully Friday. His chest has a nice little vest on it to protect it from the outside world. 

Everything is fixed and doctors don't think he'll need any more surgery in his lifetime. They will keep a close eye on his aortic arch and his aortic valve (come back to the blog tomorrow for a more detailed explanation of that). But if those don't grow with him it will be fixed in a Cath lab and not an intrusive surgery. We have a cardiologist all set up in Chicago who will watch these for us. 

1:30pm Lincoln was back in the CICU getting all settled in. 

2:45pm We were finally invited back to the CICU to see Lincoln. I got a preshow since I had to go in and grab my pump stuff. 

Speaking of pumping today I felt like I was pumping every 10 minutes. It was so hard to leave Ryan and go pump as often as I need (not every 10 minutes but a little less then every 3 hours) We figured I spend 4 hours in the "pump station" (thats the name they give to the little closet I pump in) each day. That is a lot of time I don't get to spend with Lincoln or Ryan or visitors. I keep telling myself how important it is I pump and how lucky I am to have the ability to pump. 

Seeing Lincoln was a shock. I have to admit I thought I was prepared for seeing my little man, I wasn't. Its still hard to look at him (I blame my post-pregnancy hormones) I want to cry but I keep telling myself that every tube, every machine, every IV is there to control his pain and get him better.

His whole set up. I thought the rooms were big now with all his stuff we barely squeeze in. 

He's still as cute as a button. (I don't really understand that idiom) Ryan made sure they did not mess with his face. :) 

Mr. Lincoln looks like someone out of a Star Wars movie.

Tomorrow Dr. Eckhauser will be back to explain to us again what exactly he did in the OR. Hopefully with visuals. I'll have Ryan post our understanding on the blog since he is better at understanding all the medical jargon. I just want to know if my baby is safe and healing, Ryan wants to know what every IV is and why its there. Its a good thing I married a man that cares about the details so I don't have to. 

Hopefully we are out of the CICU soon and on the 3rd floor recovery room. Recovery should only be 10 days. Lets hope Lincoln can be home soon. 

We have certainly had a very stressful and long day but we have also had many wonderful spiritual reassurances and family support. We thank everyone who fasted and prayed for our little fighter. It definitely made a difference in our day. Lincoln is done with surgery but not completely out of the woods as you can see from the pictures. So keep us in your prayers and thoughts please. 

We love all the supportive emails, text messages, facebook posts and blog comments. It reminds us that we aren't alone in this fight. Thank you so much, feel free to keep it coming. That was a blatant hint ;).